Be Fearless

Advice #5

This is one of my all time favorite topics. Fear.

I'm going to start this one off with a little psychology for you. What is fear?
Now, if a little girl toddled up to me and asked me what fear was, my first response would be
"nonsense."
Because in all reality, that's all fear really is.
All fear is, is a state of mind. But what causes us to have such an unpleasant feeling? How could an emotion be so strong that it holds back our true potential for happiness?

Now, fear is an instinct. We all have it, we're born with it. It's a key element in survival. But in this day and age, we don't rely so much on instincts anymore, yet we still let fear be a huge part of our lives.

 "As for what is fear biologically speaking, when a person experiences fear, certain areas in their brain such as the amygdala and the hypothalamus are immediately activated and appear to control the first physical response to fear. Chemicals such as adrenaline and the stress hormone cortisol are released into the blood stream causing certain physical reactions."

Fear is usually related to a past experience. Normally it's a highly unpleasant one, and you might not even remembered if something disastrous like this happened, because your body's instincts kick in and block out that memory, in an effort to keep you thinking logically. But something you're afraid of somehow reminds you of this experience, therefore your body literally goes into defense-mode. It's interesting because fear is an emotional trigger, but it's also a physical experience. You've literally lost control of your mind.
Now, what's interesting about fear is the fact that there are so many variations. I'm going to try to make this as organized as I can, but bear with me, I tend to ramble on. ;)

Here are some mild variations of fear;

The fear of future events or possible events is known as anxiety. This is one of the fears I suffer from the most, because I try to predict how things will go before they even happen. Anxiety is characterized as apprehension because we can't control what's gonna happen next, and since we can't control what might happen, it scares us. An example would be watching a horror movie. You try to predict what will happen, but you can't control it, therefore you're scared. (I love horror movies...maybe that's why I'm so anxious all the time...)

Experiencing fear when it's not necessary is known as panic. This is one of the most common types of fear because it's related to an emotional experience. An example of this would be freaking out while on a road trip because there's a group of cows crossing the road. The cows mean you no harm.

Now, there are many people that let fear control them. These people struggle with anxiety, phobias and panic attacks because they let the fear take control. Since fear is a state of mind, people who lack the ability to control their thoughts and how things affect them are usually really fearful.

It's worth noting that fear is almost always related to a possible outcome, the future. Fear is normally future-oriented, because the future means a lack of control.

If I were to give you any advice about how to stop being afraid of anything, I'd tell you to stop thinking.
If you're the kind of person that struggles with fear, you might have a control problem, because again, all fear is is a state of mind. Sure, it can be helpful with making the right decisions in life, but we, as humans, are emotional beings. We're used to reacting to what our emotions are doing. But you need to learn how to control your thoughts. There are herbal medicines and prescriptions you can take to minimize your fear, but those don't help. What it comes down to is you, and how you let yourself feel. If you don't want to be afraid of something, simply stop being afraid of it. It might take some gradual steps and some getting used to, but you control your thoughts.

Take a deep breath. Say you see a spider, so your body reacts to it and you become scared of that spider. Sure, it's not the cutest thing in the world, but take a deep breath and ask yourself, why are you scared of the spider? It's just another living creature trying to survive, like you are when you experience this fear. So take a deep breath, and change your thoughts from "HOLY SH*T A SPIDER" to ".....spiders aren't so bad.."

Think logically. You're so much bigger than the spider. Are you scared of it because they're poisonous? Look at this spider and tell me if it came in here to kill you. It didn't. It's not an assassin sent to do away with you, it's looking for food and shelter.

Handle it. Head-on. Do you want the spider to go away? Do it. Either kill that spider (aw :\) or put it outside. It won't jump up and eat you. It might run, but it's just trusting its instincts. If you want your fear to go away, and there are so many more fears out there, this is just an example, handle it. You are in control of how things affect you, especially your thoughts. And you've heard me mention this over and over, because it's one of the biggest flaws in humans. We lack the ability to control our thoughts. So if you have a specific fear, I'd love to hear it. I'm going to start a "ask evie" type of thing here soon, so if there's a fear or any topic you'd like me to take on, please say so in the comments.

-Evie